Tuesday, March 15, 2011

My Computer Is So Slow

And I have to hit the spacebar twice to make spaces.

I had a crazy road rage experience this weekend!  I'm usually a pretty good driver and try not to succumb to road rage; if someone is so gung ho to get where they are going 5 miles faster than me, I will scoot over and let them go. Usually. Last Friday was a different story.

Troy and I were driving up to my mom's house (about 1 hour and 15 minutes away). I was in a pretty bad mood  because we were going up way later than usual (it was almost 8 o'clock at night after work, not the right time for such a long drive!) and Mom had informed me that I HAD to take Tula back down with me, which just opened up a can of worms (don't feel the need to describe it here) and I was just kind of a mess. Anyway, I had just crossed over the border into WA and I noticed this guy was really riding my tail. I was already going 5 miles over the speed limit and was a little annoyed at this, but I figured I would pass a car or two more and then get over. That's when he started flashing his brights at me. I'm like, seriously? Who does that? It actually really made me angry, so when I got to an opening where I could have gotten over I didn't. I thought I'd let him pass me, that way I'd get all of my passive aggression out and he could still get his way. Well, he didn't get over. Instead he rode up even closer, flashed his lights and started honking. It was absolutely ridiculous.  Had I done the right thing, I would have gotten over, but I was really pissed at this point and I've got a hot, stubborn temper. So instead, I pull up next to a semi truck and then slow down to the speed limit. The guy had to slow down AND he  could not get over. Boy did I piss him off. Jesus. He spent the next mile or so flashing his lights and honking and riding so close that had I tapped my brakes just a bit he would have rear ended us. I pass the truck and maintain speed, Troy whipped out his cell phone (making the gesture very obvious to the car behind us) and starts to call the police and the other driver finally gets over and passes me (as I passed I noticed that he was looking pretty classy with his dirty beard, mullet and baseball hat, he was just missing a beer can, but I'm sure that was in the cup holder next to him).  After he passed me I figured that was a good time to get into the next lane. I guess he noticed that, and I suppose it really irked him because he immediately slowed down and got over to cut me off.  I went into the far right lane and he just followed like he was going to have his car body slam mine. I tried to speed up and pass him before he got all the way over (not to be a bitch, but at this point I'm actually trying to avoid an accident). He sped up to, we would have nearly crashed if I hadn't veered onto the shoulder and slowed down. I guess he thought he had won because he suddenly sped up and got away.  I wish we had finished that call to highway patrol,  but we didn't as we didn't have the car make or license plate or anything since it was dark.

That's probably the only instance of road rage I have ever really been apart of and definitely the closest I have  ever been to an accident on the freeway!

As for the rest of the weekend, it was not spectacular. Troy and I were just kind of at odds and not really getting a long (Troy is sick of having Tula at the apartment over the weekends and there is just nothing I will do about it). He spent most of the weekend working at his dad's duplexes. I spent Saturday super cleaning the apartment and Sunday just doing anything I felt like.  We also drove around and looked at houses. We have a meeting with our realtor next Sunday and I super hope we find something!!!!  We are soooo ready to move!

At work we are down one staff member starting today.  That is 25% of our team! I'm nervous that we don't have anyone to fill her place, but I think it will be ok. I'm just happy I won't have to work an extra day this week like I thought I would!

Lastly, Troy and I have finally started our swing dancing lessons! We had our first beginner lesson last Wednesday. It is a small class with only 3 couples in it, and I had a really good time. At the end of class our instructor mentioned she was starting a swing dancing team for a showcase in June and invited us all to join. We didn't think much of it, but when we told her we'd see her next week she was like "oh, you don't want to come tomorrow? You would be great!" So we gave in and joined the team! It's going to be a lot of hard work, but I think we will get it and be awesome. I'm pretty excited!

That should be it for now! Ta ta for now!

Saturday, March 5, 2011

A Long, Long Time Ago

In a galaxy far, far away I started a blog.  I am shocked to realize it has been over a month since I posted anything!  How did that happen?!

I was super grumpy pretty much all of February, so that's probably why the posts have been non-existent.  I have nothing specific to be grumpy about, I think I'm just a little stressed out in general.  I think mainly it's about getting a house.  We did a fair amount of house hunting last month, and I didn't tell anyone but close family, but we actually put an offer on one!  We offered $10,000 less than selling price, so they did counter-offer.  I'm trying to counter-offer again but I have to get through underwriting first.  It's this big ordeal, and I won't know anything until a week from Monday.  I'm really excited about the house thing becoming real, but I'm nervous that somehow I will be shot down in the end because of my poor credit history.

What else has gone on this month?  I still haven't mailed my Dad's Christmas present to him (that I legitimately had before Christmas) and I'm starting to feel guilty about it (to the point of having dreams).  I have the shipment box and everything, but the days are flying by and I just keep forgetting!  I feel guilty about my dad a lot and it results into me calling him less and feeling even guiltier.  But then again, he hasn't called me either, so maybe I shouldn't bear all the weight.

My co-worker gave a months notice that she was leaving the job and it's been two weeks and my bosses haven't even started looking for a replacement.  I'm a little stressed about that because if they fail to find someone in time for her to train then I'll be stuck with a LOT of extra work (and no, my pay will not increase, even if I work overtime, I am on salary).

Oh! We finally went snowboarding this week!  I took Thursday off and Troy and I went up to the mountain.  I had a fantastic time!  I guess it kind of is like riding a bike because I was much better than I thought I would be after not going for 10 years!  Troy was a little discouraged at first, but each run he got better and better.  I think it's something we will do a lot more often next season, now that we have the gear and understand what it's going to be like.  I'm really happy we we

That's pretty much the update.  All my animals are great.  Tula is doing really well with her puppy classes.  Someone donated a humongous cat tree to my work and no one else wanted it so I got it.  The kitties LOVE it!

So that's all I got, even after a month of not posting!  Here's to better times and more regular posts!  Cheers!

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Waffles for Dinner

In the car on the way home from work I had sooooo much to say! Then I ate waffles and now I'm in a food coma and all I want to do is play Rock Band. Also, Troy is watching a video of Kevin Smith doing stand up comedy and it's very distracting.

Anyway, I had a good weekend. We had to pick up Tula at mom's work early on Saturday. We ended up going for a hike on the Sandy River Delta so that Tula could burn some energy before we brought her home (otherwise  she chews everything and is difficult to manage). It was really nice, there were a LOT of dogs there.  It tired us out though!

I want to talk about Tula for a minute. She stresses me out. She has stranger danger issues, so she growls at people she doesn't know when they invade her space. She seems to do better when she is out and about, like on our hike plenty of people passed us, but she only slightly growled at one. I also take her to daycare on Mondays (not the one I share my work with, she seems to do better at another place that has a large outside area), and she did growl at the staff members at first, but they were so good and patient she now goes there and loves it and is totally comfortable. However, I took her to puppy class on Monday evening and she really had a hard time. She growled at everyone and I could tell they were all nervous which really stresses me out. As a Mastiff mix, she's a big girl and I can't blame other people for being scared, but it makes me sad when other people think she's dangerous. Especially at this point when I can't rule out that she's not, there is possibility she could bite someone, hence puppy classes. The puppy class trainer is going to call me tomorrow, and I think she'll kick me out of class  and tell me to do one-on-one training. I'm happy to do that, I'm just disappointed that Tula can't handle group classes. I didn't know initially how much of a problem child she actually is, I would have re-thought the adoption as I really don't have the skills to handle this. Luckily, I have resources to gain the skills, and I love her enough to be willing to do whatever I can to get her over her fears.  It's just, man, it's stressful!

I'm going with my mom to see a psychic on Saturday. I've been to her a couple of times, and I am still confused as to what I believe, but regardless, it's comforting to go to someone and be reassured that life isn't out of control. It's like a therapy session....if the therapist believes they are speaking to you through angels. Like I said, I'm confused, she might be.

But I don't believe in God. I don't want to offend anyone, but I want to say, clearly, that I don't believe in it.  I don't get to announce that very often. But this is my blog and I can say what I want without feeling judged.  So there you have it, America, I'm possibly an atheist (or not, depending on the angel thing).

Out.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Oy

Last week sucked balls.

I missed my swing dancing class that I was SOOOO excited about!  I got off work early and everything just to find out the class was actually at 6:30 and not 7:30!  I was pretty bummed.

The next morning (dreaded Tuesdays) I had to drive to Troutdale to drop Tula off with my mom at her work.  It should only take me 1/2 to get there... an hour and 15 minutes into my drive and I wasn't even close, in fact I was borderline late for work, so I had to give up and take my lunch break to drop her off.

I don't even remember the other things that went wrong, it just seems like everything did.  Troy was denied a secured credit card, which really blows because he needs credit for us to get a house! Two of my coworkers are breaking up with their boyfriends (both fairly long term relationships) and that just gives a depressing air to the entire organization.  We had significant computer issues effecting our Point of Sale software.  I forgot to put cheese on my turkey sandwich (it's the best part!). It was little things like that, they just kept piling up until I was frustrated and exhausted.  The worst was that it wasn't just Monday and Tuesday, but the ENTIRE week was like that.  I think it's noteworthy to mention there was a full moon.

My weekend wasn't much better, although it wasn't particularly bad either.  I spent Friday and Saturday night at my mom's farm babysitting my sister.  I don't know if I have mentioned yet, or not, that my sister has a severe neurological disability.  She cannot walk or talk or use her fine motor skills.  She has to wear a diaper and have people feed her; she enjoys toys and shows aimed at toddlers (she turns 21 this year).  Yet, she does understand a LOT more than most people give her credit for.  She listens and can do some things (big movements, like wheeling her wheelchair, handing items to people, turning on and off toys and the TV, things like that).  She is also the happiest, most vibrant person I have ever met.  She loves being hugged and kissed.  She can't talk in English, but she does have her own vocabulary made of gestures and noises.  She has shaped me to be a far better human being than I would have if I had a "normal" sister with whom I would have been in constant competition in (I'm sure of it!).

Anyway, with all that being said, no matter how much I love my little sister there is no doubt that babysitting her (and the many dogs at mom's house, including two of my own) comes with many responsibilities.  So the weekend was less than relaxing even though I didn't actually do anything.

But it's all good.  Life would be unbalanced if there were no bad weeks.  Plus, I'm willing to pay my dues for all the very wonderful things that are happening in my life (I have a tremendously good relationship, awesome animals, a loving family, a good job, luxury items to keep me constantly entertained, food on the table, lights in the apartment, the list goes on!).

And around the first of February I should be able to give my loan officer the go-ahead to run my credit and actually get the ball rolling on a new house.  If that isn't exciting and happy enough then I am very ungrateful!  Despite the rough start, I am confident that 2011 is going to be a great year!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

1/11/11

I just want to talk for a minute about my step-father.  I'm thinking about him a lot today because today was his and my mom's 13th wedding anniversary.  He died last month of cancer, and it was a very sad thing, but the way he went and his ability to say goodbye to everyone he loves made all of us capable of handling it.

Everyone has to die.  It just has to happen, for all our technology and medicine, we can't stop people from dying, and I don't think that we should. I think when it happened to my step-dad people expected me to be much more broken hearted, hell, I expected myself to be more broken hearted, but I wasn't, and I think that actually says a lot about him more so then it does about me. He made it bearable for me by letting me know every single time I talked to him, how proud he was of me and how much he loved me. There were no regrets.  

More importantly, he left in such a way that, though he was her best friend and greatest love, my mom is able to continue with her life without a shatter heart break. I don't really know how to explain it, she is grieving and she misses him, but she, too, has absolutely no regrets.

I wish I could go on, but I'm having a lot of trouble finding the right words, and now I'm getting tired. Part of the point is that he took care of my mom even in dying, and in that way he is taking care of me.  I was so worried about today. After he had died we had to plan the memorial services, and there was family all around; then the holidays came and there was family all around, but I knew that today, their anniversary, there wouldn't be anyone for her except myself and my grandmother, and I thought of all times this would be the worse for her.  It's devastating to know someone you love so much can be in so much pain and there is nothing you can offer in the way of relief. But she's ok, and that makes me ok

Boring

I just want to say to RaeAnn, I have no passions either!!

There are a lot of things I want to try to do, but I'm not really "passionate" about anything and I'm never really that good at something.  I kind of know how to knit, I kind of know how to sew,  I kind of know how to play the saxophone, I'm ok at writing but never have any good ideas, I kind of know how to play video games, but not super baller...the list goes on. The thing is, you can't be more than mediocre at anything unless you are 1) born with amazing genius talents or 2) (more likely) put a LOT of time into getting good at it.  I just don't care enough about one thing to dedicate that much time.  I don't think it's just me and Rae, I think a lot of people are in the same boat.

I am excited to start my dance class, but I'm sure we won't practice outside the weekly classes so, again, I won't become some amazing dancer. I just want to get one good choreographed dance so that when Troy and I get married in 2013 (diamond ring is on the New Years resolution list, so it's not official yet) we can rock out that first dance.

Anyway, sometimes I'm bummed about not having a definitive hobby, I wish that there was something I was really good at. Then I try to look at it from another angle, maybe I shouldn't be sad that there isn't one thing I'm good, but focus on everything that I know even a little bit about, and be proud that I know that much and could build on the knowledge if I wanted to.  And why do it if it doesn't make you happy? You can't force a hobby. If you try knitting and it becomes a chore before you know how to make more than a scarf, whatever, stop and pick it up later, or never.  Life is about being happy, not about forcing yourself to do something that you hope makes you happy if you put enough energy into it.  It probably won't. You'll probably just resent the time it's taking away from things you wish you were doing (even if that other thing is mundane like reading or TV or kitty cat time).

Take this blog. I'm not very good at it, I'm pretty sure only one person is reading it (thank you RaeAnn!), but  rambling on and on is somehow satisfying so I'll keep going until it's not.  Then it will go in the book of Things I Kinda Did Once.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Title

Today is Sunday. Not a great one because I had to go into work for a volunteer orientation. It's the only one I have to attend just to see how it's done, and I've been putting it off, so I finally sucked it up and just went. It sucked about as much as I expected, but at least its over. Check!

The rest of my weekend has been spent eating copious amounts of sugar and playing World of Warcraft. I love this game, although I like to keep my little affair with MMORPG's under wraps in the real world. It's weird though, a lot of the game is about building online relationships with people through questing together and going into dungeons (I don't wear glasses, but pretend I just pushed them up while snorting), but that's the only part of the game I hate! I freak out when a stranger comes near me; the last thing I want to do is have to interact with someone I don't know! Stranger danger! Stranger danger! I guess I'm afraid that they'll find out how truly horrible I really am at the game despite 4 years of playing (on and off). Honestly, I'm pretty bad. Mediocre at best. It's ok with me, but I don't want to drag other players down with me.

In other news Troy is finally cooking dinner. Thank goodness, I'm starving here!  That's pretty much how it goes, Troy cooks ALWAYS and I do the dishes ALWAYS. If Troy  is gone for some reason there is a good chance I won't eat.  If I'm gone for someone reason there's a good chance I'll come back to the Leaning Tower of Crusty Dishes.  But we like it this way. It works. Especially because he is a really, really good cook. There are a lot of restaurant meals I don't even like anymore because he makes them better! That also makes us to eat healthier (except for the aforementioned copious amounts of sugar).

Part of our New Years Resolutions is getting healthier. We aren't too bad off, neither of us are overweight and I don't think we are excessive eaters, but part of that is definitely luck. We don't exercise regularly, and we keep getting into these ruts of just eating shitty food for weeks at a time (like fast food several times a week, or coating all our homemade meals in cream sauces and cheese).  Definitely need to fix that! It's something we were working on last year, and did really well during the summer, but then we both got new jobs and our schedules changed and then fall came with it's darker days and then the holidays and then my stepdad passed away and it's been a mess. But we're ready now, first we're changing our food and then we'll add in exercise.

Speaking of exercise, we are going to be taking a swing dancing class (courtesy of my Nana) starting a week from Monday. Super stoked!

I know this is an unseemly and abrupt end to the post today, but I just got distracted for like 1/2 an hour and now dinner is ready! I'll beback!

Oh, real quick, I just want to mention that we watched Shutter Island last night (I know old-ish movie, but I've been wanting to see it) and I LOVED it! It's my favorite kind of horror movie, less pop-out and scare you and more psychological thriller.  It got pretty neutral reviews, but I would recommend it to people who like those kind of movies. Plus I'm in love with Leonard DiCaprio. Ok, dinner is waiting, bye!